As God Sees Us

My pastor preached on the principle that we should see ourselves as God says He sees us if we are going to improve our self-image. I have seen and experienced how much we can help each other with that new vision. As Ed preached the memory that came to my mind was not about me but starred my ex-husband.

When my husband chose to sober up God began to deal with the wreckage alcoholism had made in our family members' personalities and characters. Naturally our values and beliefs had to change. However, we were not left alone in our quest to merely grasp wisdom from books, even the Bible, though we did read and meditate. We were surrounded by people who stuck so close to us they could see in the debris of our self-centered thinking that sought after attitudes and characteristics were taking shape. It was those qualities they made sure to point out.

That was a complete change for me. I was used to being confronted only if I was being corrected or reprimanded. I assumed I was doing everything right if nothing was said at all. I lived by the motto, no news is good news, you might say. But now we were in the midst of people who addressed our virtues as they saw them and it was reinforcing our positive behavior as we reached for the higher values of a sane and sober life.

One of the most dramatic changes I ever saw was in my husband. Not long after he joined the organization that was helping us he told me on the way home from a meeting, "Don't get to thinking we have some extra money since I'm sober. I have to give a dollar in every meeting when they pass the basket and you have to give a dollar in your meeting, too."

What? Do you think I didn't pass math, I wondered? Like I couldn't tell the difference between the costs of a case of beer every night and a dollar at a meeting! To say the least, my drinking husband was not generous. After several months of being sober I asked him if I could invite some friends over to our house after the meeting. He agreed, so, I told him we needed to go by Duncan Donuts and get a dozen donuts to have for refreshments.

We had so much fun we continued to invite friends over after the meetings. Each week our guest list grew and so did our donut purchases. Before long we extended our invitation to everyone who wanted to come and we provided the donuts and coffee. Almost every room of our house was filled with the babble of people with a common problem who were seeking a common solution and becoming friends on their journey.

One night, after everone had gone my husbnad and I were discussing our 'party' while he washed coffee cups. Suddenly a thought raced through my mind and without thinking I blurted it out. "Thank you for being so generous. It's your generosity that makes this work."

Actually, I had never thought of my husband as generous before, but his reaction told me I had hit the mark and that he wanted to be known as a generous man. Without a word, he stood up a little straighter, squaring his shoulders and lifting his head just a touch even though his hands were still in dish water.

From that moment to this, one of his greatest assets has been his generosity. It's one of the first things you think of when you hear his name.